Well hello Internet, and happy last day of February! That’s right guys. You made it. You did it! You survived the horror of Jefbruary, you held on through the horrible movies, the terrible weather and the somehow even worse political nightmarescape and you made it to March where at least one of those things will change… though probably not the other two. But let’s not focus on the fact that we can’t change the fact that the weather is having a severe identity crises, or the fact that no one seems to know what exactly is going on in the news or the fake news or… whatever we’re calling it. And let’s just focus on the fact that new movies are coming, and some of them are probably, maybe, sort of gonna pretty good!! Yay!!
March 2017 Movie Preview
I’m sorry for the weird pictures today… wordpress is being strange again…
March 3rd –
Okay I’m REALLY trying to tempter my expectations for Logan but it’s getting increasingly harder. The movies gotten great reviews, it’s finally a movie that seems to have caught on the usual Fox-movie tropes out, and it’s Hugh Handsom Jackmen!! I’m all in on this and can’t wait to see it! That said I will be VERY sad when it’s over, because it’s apparently a very sad movie, but it’s not like the trailers were exactly a barrel full of laughs. This is gonna be a great movie, but I’m going to be VERY sad after words and may eat my weight in pasta (or pasta like substitutes.)
Anna Kendrick and a band of other quirky actors play in a movie about a bunch of quirky people seated together at a wedding. These movie tend to either work really well, or be one million percent broken so… it’s a toss-up. There’s a delicate line between quirky and unwatchable as it turns out, which is, consequently, why my career as a professional dancer never panned out.
March 10th –
Kong: Skull Island
I’m weirdly interested in this movie. I say that because I’ve never really gotten the whole “King Kong” thing. I mean sure it made sense in like the 20’s when the coolest thing people could think up was “A monkey, but big” but nowadays we have Godzilla, and whatever those monsters were called in Pacific Rim and a bunch of way cooler things then “Hey look, that monkey is larger than a monkey should be.” But this movie actually looks pretty good! Tom Hiddleston, Sam Jackson, Brie Larson, and John Goodman make for a killer cast and I’m genuinely interested to see what happens here.
March 17th –
Beauty and the Beast
It’s weird too me that we’re about to kick off a generation of children who see Emma Watson and think “Belle” instead of “Hermione” but whatever. Look, this movie won’t be exactly changing the landscape of film forever, but it’s got a great cast, a good storyline, an established and well known musical score… it’s hard to see this NOT being good. Once again, it’s not gonna be a new and revolutionary step in film or anything, but it’s GOT to be good… right?
March 24th –
Look… I tried to be optimistic about this… probably. At some point. But I’ve seen the trailers, I’ve watched the ineffective high school actors, struggle with a lazy sounding script, and distinctly B looking effects and I’m officially ready to announce: This movie will be the sucks. REALLLLLLLY the sucks. Suckity suck such from Suckburg. Sorry both you Power Rangers fans… nothing to see here.
March 31st –
Ghost in the Shell
I’m still torn about this one. The original anime’ was… revolutionary?? I mean it was good. It looked good. But it didn’t exactly make sense, so much as it made ZERO sense. At all. So hopefully this movie can keep the cool visual style and sweet punchity, kickity action. But can also be (as the French would say) sensical.
And there you go guys! Some sweet sweet snowy deliciousness from the wonderful month of March. Thanks March. You’re the best!
Oh and if you haven’t hear my new podcast yet, we just put out our second episode and it’s exactly as random and Quail filled as you would expect! Check it out here: thepsv.podbean.com