Posts Tagged ‘Blade Runner: 2049’

Well hey audience! Welcome back to another thrilling entry in our beloved yet long forgotten series: Judging Covers, wherein I (your beloved and benevolent host) watch a bunch of trailers and then jump to ridiculous conclusions based on them.

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This is a VERY scary trailer. Be advised.

Sweet baby chains that looks terrifying doesn’t it? I mean why did you watch that? How will you ever be a rambunctious 80’s child without being terrified of awful clown men?? I’m still not entirely sure how much like the book this movie is going to be, because the book didn’t really go all scary clown all the time. There was more than enough scary clown mind you, but just not ALL scary clown. I’ve typed scary clown to many times guys. It’s starting to wig me out. Why am I talking about them again? Oh yeah. It. Looks terrifying but I will probably watch it on account of… why AM I gonna watch that? What has Stephen King done for me lately?? Has he scared that one clown that keeps showing up in my backyard away?? Has HE been responsible for Idris Elba having awesome cowboy guns and reloading them in the dopest way imaginable?? Oh wait… he did do that one didn’t he?

Blade Runner 2049

I was genuinely just set to not be excited about this movie and just let the warm and vague memories I have of the original Blade Runner keep me warm in the night time… but that trailer actually looked VERY good. Like… almost unnaturally good. Ford looks great, Gosling’s character seems to have some interesting things to do, and Jared Leto playing that one weird guy he always plays seems like it’s gonna actually work this time! I don’t WANT to be excited for this… but I very much am.

Kingsman The Golden Circle

Look, the first movie in this series was… more or less fine. It existed. It tried to strike a weird balance between making constant fun of James Bond movies and how dumb they were, while at the same time definitely being one of those movies. It was fun in its own weird way and I’m excited about the addition of Pedro Pascal and Channing Tatum’s one facial expression. My guess is this will be exactly as entertaining as the first one which is to say: marginally entertaining if you like this sort of hyper-action style of movie. So that was… helpful??? I guess.

Star Wars The Last Jedi

All right guys, it’s time for the big show! The Last Jedi… or maybe The Last Jedi(s)?? Hard to say. It’s a classic sort of deer/deer(s) scenario except with lightsabers and the constantly miserable face of Adam Driver and that tiny scar he got from when Rey cut most of his face off. Or something. Anyway, I’m all in on the Rey/Luke training montage that I’m pretty sure will make up most of this movie. It’ll be set up against the VERY different training of Kylo Ren and his master Gollum. I mean Snoke. While this is going on our noble but not as powerful friends Po and Dipsy will set about saving the galaxy from whatever it is that guy from Harry Potter is doing this time. And that’s what’s going to happen in the Last Jedi… except for the parts I made up for humor… And cause I don’t actually have any idea what’s gonna happen in The Last Jedi.

Well thanks for coming along with me on this magical journey to the made up future audience! Check back in next week when I review Guardians of the Galaxy and then… do something else. That I will make up at the time.

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Ah children of the Internet! Hello, and welcome to a special and sacred time of year. A time when we look at the year ahead with hope in our hearts… potentially for the last time. But let’s not worry about that right now. Let us instead turn our attention to what I like to call:

Micah’s Top Ten Most Anticipated Movies of 2017

But before we get to the top ten let’s… let’s talk about the DC Comics shaped elephant in the room. Namely: DC Comics.

Not appearing on the list: Justice League and Wonder Woman. Sorry guys, I refuse to get excited about DC  movies anymore. I’ve been hurt too much. Yes Wonder Woman’s trailers look really good, and sure Justice League seems like a can’t miss team up but we literally saw both of those things with these years DC movies (Suicide Squad and Batman V Superman respectively) and both of those movies ended up on my worst movies of the year list!! And so… I’m out. I really hope these are good, but I will not be excited for them. You’ve burned me too many times DC. You’ve singed my heart with many… singes. And you’ll have to earn it back… with unsinging… or something.

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Sorry lady… you seem like you’ve got a great… X. But you’ll have to let Rotten Tomatoes convince me.

 

Anway:

  1. Lego Batman/Kong: Skull Island

Yes, I’m doubling up on number 10, but that’s just because either of these two movies could go really south really fast. Lego Batman looks fine but I haven’t really seen anything to make me think it’ll be anything more than a cash in on Batman’s success in The Lego Movie. And Kong just… worries me. There’s a lot of ‘dumb action movie’ potential here and the only thing that really intrigues me about it is the cast they’ve assembled. So both of these are ‘I’ll see them if they get good reviews’ entries, and so they slunked in here at number 10.

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Keep your batwings crossed everyone.

 

  1. The Mummy

Yes, I have also been burned by the “New Age Classic Monsters” series twice now (Frankenstein and Dracula Untold) but I do love the idea of this movie, and the trailer looked very cool and they’ve at least had the gumption to put it in with the other summer blockbusters rather than burying it in the fall/spring like they did the last two. I’m cautiously optimistic on this one and I feel like worst case scenario it’ll be a fun romp movie.

  1. Spiderman: Homecoming

This movie ended up being WAY lower on this list than I thought it would be. Maybe I’m more burned out on Spiderman than I thought I was. I really like Tom Holland in the role though and I feel like the inclusion of Iron Man and Marvel studios will really give this movie a lot more to work with than the previous Spiderman series. That said: this is my third Spiderman now and eventually I’m REALLY gonna stop caring entirely.

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Also: great suit… or suite… sweet???

 

  1. Beauty and the Beast

For the most part I’ve abstained from Disney’s whole “live action classics” movement. Not because I thought they were bad (most of them were quite good) but because I felt like I had already been there and done that. The movies were fine for bouncing baby Micah, but had no place in the life of bouncy adult Micah. Beauty and the Beast though… I mean come on. It’s probably the best of the classic Disney cartoons and they literally cast the PERFECT group of people for this. I mean perfect. Look at this poster. Look at it!!

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I mean look at that cast!!!

 

So yes… I’m excited.

  1. Thor: Ragnarok

Thor 2 was not a great movie. It was a fun movie, and I had fun watching it, but it wasn’t great. But I feel like Marvel looked at that and learned from it, and thus we’re getting the first of (what I hope will be a long run of) Marvel team up movies. Teaming up Thor and Hulk was a no brainer and I’m super excited to see what this ends up looking like. The cast is great, they got rid of Natalie Portman’s character who never really felt like she did anything at all for the narrative and I’m ready to see what Loki and Thor can get up to this time around!

  1. Logan

Look… I’m not super proud of this. I mean, what have the X-men done for me lately? X-men apocalypse was terrible, the last Wolverine solo movie was… fine. Even X-men: Days of Future past didn’t exactly turn the world on its head or anything. But I’m super excited/interested to see what Logan ends up being. I’m all the way behind this if for nothing else because Hugh Jackmen has always been a great Wolverine even if the movie around him wasn’t very good. Here’s hoping we can send him off with the movie he deserves.

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I’m not in the habit of saying this… but that is an attractive old man.

 

  1. Blade Runner: 2049

I feel like if we learned anything from Star Wars: The Force Awakens it’s that Harrison Ford still has something left in the tank. Blade Runner was an interesting world, and handing off the series to Ryan Gosling is a very smart move. I’m interested to see what happens with this and the trailer has a really great feel to it! That said I don’t feel like Ridley Scott (the director of this and the original movie (and the Alien franchise)) really knows the difference between a good movie and a bad movie anymore. He’s just making movies at this point because people keep writing him checks. We’ll just have to see which side of the coin this one lands on.

  1. The Dark Tower

Goodness we’ve been waiting a long time for someone to make this movie! But it’s finally happening and the casting of Idris Elba as the Gunslinger has brought me huge amounts of joy and comfort over this movies long production process. That said, there’s a very good chance the wheels came off this at some point along the LOOOOOONNNNGGGG road to cinemas. I mean the source material is huge and complex and very well loved so… I mean there’s a real chance this’ll be bad. But I’m gonna ignore all that and just be excited that someone is finally making this movie! Here’s hoping they don’t screw up the end of the first book! Cause if they mess up the end of that book I will walk right out of that theater as fast as my bouncy legs can carry me.

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Now see… that is a cool picture.

 

  1. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

Love the cast, love the trailer, love the vibe and the music and… look. There are a lot of shaky bets on this top ten list but I feel very safe in saying: this movie will be a lot of fun. I don’t know if it’ll be as good as the first movie or not, but it’s gonna be just a big old bouncing ball of fun and frenetic space action! And that’ll work for me!

  1. Star Wars: Episode 8
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Star Wars Episode 8: The Next Star War

 

Yeah I know… big surprise. But what can I say guys: I’m REAL excited for this. I’m excited to re-connect with Rey and find out more of her back story, I’m excited to see what Finn gets up to with his best bro-pal Po. I’m excited to find out if Mark Hamill can make Luke into less of a dweeb and if Kylo Ren can be less of a whiny, grease headed failure. I’m just very excited for this movie. Fortunately for me: it comes out in December so… I’ll have a good long while to nurse that excitement.

And there you have it guys, probably the least surprising most anticipated movie since… well the last Star Wars movie to come out. Check back in Thursday when I do my annual wild predictions post and see how I did on my predictions for 2016!! I literally don’t remember any of them, so it’ll be a nice trip down memory lane for everyone!