10 Most Romantic Movies

Posted: February 14, 2017 by Micah in Randomnicity
Tags: , , , , , ,

Well hey Internet, and happy Valentine’s Day! A day that for about half the Internet we spend the day being thankful for the loved ones in our lives, and for the other half it’s a bitter, raging fire of garbage. But hey: super big sale on candy tomorrow right? Shouldn’t that bring everyone together? I’ve done a couple Valentine’s themed posts over lo these many years and I thought this year we would go ahead and answer the question that’s been on ALL y’alls lips: what is the most romantic movie… of all time!!

The 10 Most Romantic Movies of All Times.

Now, to give credit where credit is due: this is not my list. This is a list compiled by AMC movies, based on an audience poll. I have no idea what the ten most romantic movies of all time are, because I have a very loose grasp on romance. This would be like asking a dog to rate it’s ten favorite Carps, maybe that dog knows what carp is, but he doesn’t understand Carp enough to actually form a list of carp. So I thought who better to entrust with this crucial list, than the Internet!!… Oh… literally anyone else huh? Oops.

  1. Love Actually

Oh good… this charisma black hole again…


Well way to start off with a movie I strongly disagree with there, Internet. Love Actually features: a grieving father trying to hook up his 8 year old son. A best friend who VERY creepily confesses his love for said best friends wife roughly an hour after they get married. A man cheating on his wife. And Hugh Freekin’ Grant… I mean WHY? This is really what you want to experience in your romantic life internet??

  1. Titanic

Yeah, this was a terrible idea. The Titanic?? This is an eight hour long movie detailing the least surprising boat crash in history, and telling the story of a poor boy with no redeeming features other than “he’s pretty.” And an aloof heiress with the common sense of a puddle. Who (in the end) show a shocking lack of understanding as to how floating pieces of wood work.

  1. Pride and Prejudice

Is that Darcy or her shoulder angel?


This is a fine entry. Just to clarify this is the Kierra Knightley version and not the Collin Firth one, but whatever. They’re both fine. Both tell the story of an incredibly stuck up man, who does one nice thing with his life, and is instantly rewarded with the love of a woman who had heretofore hated him for VERY good reasons.

  1. Roman Holiday

This picture features both a literal and a metaphorical third wheel!


Aw, now see this is a great movie!! Audrey Hepburn just Hepburning out all over the joint! It’s basically reverse Cinderella but I mean come on! How is this not WAY higher on the list??

  1. Breakfast at Tiffany’s

The most hilarious heroine?? Even the cat isn’t sure about that.


Okay now see… I think Roman Holiday is a better movie than this. This is a great movie but let’s talk about the racist elephant in the room shall we?? Yeah, what was Mickey Rooney doing in this movie?? I realize it was a different time but did know on see Mickey Rooney in costume for this and go: “Wait… this is CRAZY racist isn’t it??” Great movie, but I’d still put Roman Holiday above it.

  1. Now, Voyager

Okay I’m not gonna lie… I have no idea what this is… hang on. This is a 1942 movie based on a book by the same name and starring Bette Davis. Wow… I just read the plot synopsis for this movie and… dang. I think I need a nap. I mean it sounds romantic I guess but… man. I’d much rather watch Roman Holiday and maintain the tiny teeny amount of faith in humanity that I have left.

  1. Sense and Sensibility

How is Sense and Sensibility this high??? I mean, I’m not an expert but isn’t Pride and Prejudice better? Granted this movie has Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman but you know who else’s sleazy, greasy, Britishy face is all up in here??? Hugh Grant.

  1. The Notebook

Least appropriate boating attire imaginable.


Okay now… give me a moment to compose myself. This is a BAD movie guys. Why are there so many dang birds?? We get it. We’re all birds. Or the main character girl is a bird?? Secondly: laying in the road is not romantic! People die that way. You. Specifically. Will die. I hope. You know who the best character in this whole movie was?? Lon. Lon was patient, and steadily loved a girl who (apparently) was a pheasant in another life or something. Pheasant-girl was off making googly eyes with that guy who STALKED her, and Lon was paying the bills. Putting in the work. Lon, is a national treasure. Swan-lake or whatever her name was, is a terrible person who apparently couldn’t be bothered to look up Ryan Goslings address so she could send him a letter. This is a bad movie guys.

  1. Casablanca

Don’t get me wrong here but… is Casablance really a romance?? It’s mostly a war movie/drama. There are romantic parts to be sure, and it’s a GREAT movie, but I don’t know that I would call it a romance.

  1. Gone with the Wind

Umm… what?

WHAT?!?!?!?!? WHHHAT?!??!!? Internet what have you done!! Gone With the Wind is not a romance. It’s a long sordid history of two HORRIBLE people, who get married for the wrong reasons, constantly fight, name a baby (I swear I’m not making this up) Bonnie Blue Butler and then break up!!! How is THIS the most romantic movie ever in your mind??? Do you guys secretly want to be Scarlet, who marries about 8 people over the course of this movie, stalks her best friends husband, and makes every decision in her life based on what her waist line will be?? Do men want to be Rhett Butler, who spends YEARS selfishly terrorizing a woman until she finally marries him and then he INSTANTLY changes his mind about that and only stays with her because of his terribly named daughter?? WHY???

Okay… sorry… Ya know what?? No. I refuse to accept this list. I thought I could trust you with this internet but I can’t. Here, take this edited list, and go have a happy Valentine’s day. I’m sorry I lost my temper… it’s not your fault.

  1. Sense and Sensibility
  2. Breakfast at Tiffany’s
  3. Pride and Prejudice
  4. Roman Holiday

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