Well hey guys, I know, I know. I missed a day last week. I’m sorry. I apologize. Don’t make a big thing out of it okay? Some times I just need my freedom, just need to spread my wings and fly like an eagle… into the future.

Or something.

Anyway, now that I’ve reviewed Avengers: Age of the Best Thing Ever, let’s go ahead and wrap up our summer questions series with another gentle tip-toe through some movie tulips!!

Question 1: Will you watch Magic Mike XXL?

Ummm… no. But I feel like that’s just cause I’m the exact opposite of the target audience for this movie. I mean I’m not super against it, I don’t think it or its predecessor are bad movies, I don’t think they’re awesome movies. They are movies that are not made for me though, and that’s fine. Whatever. I am mostly indifferent about such things, let Channing Tatum and his one astonishingly unexpressive facial expression whisk you away to a magical pelvic thrusting land. I’ll be here… probably watching the Avengers again.

Question 2: What’s the deal with Pixels?

Oh Pixels… I love the idea for this movie. It’s weird and off beat and an awesome idea for a weird sort of off beat action movie/comedy. Basically aliens have invaded earth ‘disguised’ as 80’s video game characters. It’s a great idea. That said, there are two huge (not a fat joke… mostly) elephants in the room: Adam Sandler and Kevin James are in this. I’m not saying having those two automatically make this a bad movie but… doesn’t it kind of??? I mean at some point we’ve got to just stop expecting these people to be in good movies right? If this movie starred literally anyone else I would be legitimately excited, if it had a legitimate action star paired up with a legitimate comic actor I would be even more excited. But it doesn’t have those things. And I am not excited. Forgive me Pacman.

Question 3: What’s up with Tom Cruise? Can Mission Impssible: Rogue Nation keep his streak alive?

Tom Cruise is (as weird as this is to type) on a roll movie wise. Edge of Tomorrow was great, the last mission impossible was fantastic, even Jack Reacher was better then most people think. I don’t know of any reason not to think Mission Impossible will be great. The trailer looks good, the cast works well together, and the store seems like a decent idea. Those are pretty much all the pieces you need to make a good action movie. Remember when life was simpler and we could all just make fund of Tom Cruise and his weird hair and space based religion??? I miss those days.

STRICTLY EMBARGOED: 8:00am PST March 22, 2015 Rebecca Ferguson and Tom Cruise in a scene from the motion picture "Mission Impossible 5." Credit: Chiabella James, Paramount Pictures [Via MerlinFTP Drop]

Weirdest piggy back ride ever…

Question 4: Can The Man from UNCLE live up to it’s awesome trailer?

Potentially yeah. I like the cast here, and the sense of humor seems to be spot on, so as long as the story is passable I think this could be a fun old school spy movie. Nice to see someone take the genre back to it’s smarmy roots in the same year that Rogue Nation and the new James Bond movie continue to make the genre darker and grittier and less shirt wearingyer. It would be really cool just to see an old school fun, slightly over the top spy movie and this looks like it may fit the bill!

So suave... so smooth. Like chocolate milk wearing a bow tie.

So suave… so smooth. Like chocolate milk wearing a bow tie.

Question 5: Why is Meryl Streep dressed like a punk rocker?? Is the world ending?

Wait... what's happening?

Wait… what’s happening?

Probably. From what I can tell the movie is about Streep as a failed rock and roll artist returning home to see her daughter and x-husband. Not exactly the greatest movie premise ever but hey, Meryl Streep, punk rocker, I’m in for that action. No premise required.

Well there you go guys!! Our Summer questions!! I did leave Ant-man and Fantastic Four off of year as I feel I’ve talked about them a lot in the last few weeks! Check back next week as I field some more letters from made up famous people.

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