Mystery Science Theater 3000

Posted: March 19, 2015 by Micah in Randomnicity
Tags: , ,

Hello Internet and welcome to a very special addition posting. First off, before we get to any of my usual nonsensicalness, I want to wish a very happy birthday to my one and only, very special, sweet honey glazed croissant of awesome, my wife.  Happy Birthday you wonderful breakfast snack in a world of lowfat Special K bars made of gravel and sawdust. Happy Birthday.

So now that that’s done let’s talk about something slightly less near and dear to my tiny shriveled heart: Mystery Science Theater 3000.

It's the sauce... made of awesome.

It’s the sauce… made of awesome.

For those of you uninitiated MST3K (as we true believers call it) was a show created in 1988 that ran for 10 seasons (roughly) and featured the basic premise of 3 dudes sitting around and making fun of things. And that was it. And that was awesome. I was first introduced to MST3K by my older brother many and many a year ago in a kingdom by the sea. All I remember was that he said I wouldn’t get it, which was (frankly) probably true. When I was a child I was not exactly one of the brighter lights in the good Lord’s harbor, if you take my meaning.

Anyway, many years passed, many moons set and rose, many children howled at the moon, shook it off, and did the thriller and then a few years ago I (through a series of events so monumental that I do not at all recall them) was re-introduced to the show. This time I actually watched it and discovered that inside of the weird 90’s TV graininess there was much awesomeness to be had. Much. Much. Awesomeness.

Now it should be noted that a lot of the references on the show are a little dated and some episodes certainly hold up better then others but within each cold winter lies the rose… or something. And within each episode of MST3K lies some awesomeness. Here below is a list of five episodes you should watch counting it’s way up to what is probably the greatest episodes of Mystery Science Theater of all time.

Number 5: The Pod People

A weird Euro movie in which some aliens crash to earth and proceed to not really do much of anything. The formula for MST3K always depended on the movie. Some movies were legitimately to terrible even to be saved by the commentary but Pod People and the other films on this list hit the sweetspot of still being really terrible but also being just entertaining enough to be mockable.

Number 4: Santa Claus

For when your in the Holiday mood but also want to watch Santa make broad racial stereotypes and combat the devil over the soul of a small Spanish girl named (for reasons unknown to man) Lupita.

Number 3: The Projected Man

Because even the British can make a bad monster movie.

Number 2: Hamlet

Maybe I’m a little Shakespeare biased but this episode has always cracked me up. It’s an English dubbed, German version of Shakespeare’s classic awesome play that 100% ruins histories greatest drama.

Number 1: Werewolf

Some of the other things on this list are fairly interchangeable but this is easily and undisputedly the greatest MST3K of all time. A native American version of the classic Werewolf story that somehow stars a gorilla wearing a bat mask in the role of the werewolf.

Now most of these episodes listed above are on Hulu. (and most episodes are on Youtube thanks to people with no regard for copyright laws) so get out there and watch some hilarity my friends.

And there you have it friends. A shorter post today to be sure but it is my wife’s birthday and honey if you’re reading this, I’m totally not cutting it short so I can run out and grab some last minute presents… definitely not doing that.

Also: for those of you who are not not my wife… they’ll be another blog tomorrow guys….

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