2012’s Top Ten Movies

Posted: January 3, 2013 by Micah in Movie Reviews
Tags: , , , , ,

Well hey everyone!! Happy 2013! And as we walk bravely into that great new year, with our hearts in our hands and our brains in our… bags… or something. Let us pause for a moment and look back on the year that was. Let us wash the dust off of our rose colored glasses and see what really happened in 2012! And so, with only slightly more adieu, here are my top ten movies of 2012!!

(Some slight adieu: I still haven’t watched a couple movies that I would have circled for contention on this list such as: Wreck it Ralph, Safety Not Guaranteed, and Lincoln. But oh well. There you have it. And here you have: The top ten… ish.

10. The Amazing Spiderman

Say what you want about the movie, but I think we can all agree that this is an awesome picture.

Say what you want about the movie, but I think we can all agree that this is an awesome picture.

Yay more Spiderman controversy!! For reals though. I liked the Amazing Spiderman, I can understand people who thought the old Spiderman movies were better, I’m sure Galileo understood the people who thought the sun revolved around the earth, it didn’t make him any less right. — No. For really real though. Regardless of your thoughts on the re-boot, I hope you enjoyed this new take on Spiderman’s story, and hey you know what? I think we can all agree some Spiderman is better than no Spiderman at all. Now eat your veggies.

9. Ice Age

Ha ha it says Crab.... get it??

Ha ha it says Crab…. get it??

What? Shut-up. I liked Ice Age 4. It was fun and hilarious and there were squirrels on hang gliders. What more could I ask for? Seriously though this is probably my favorite kids movie of the year, and I had to put a kids movie on the list or I would have angry mothers talking about how pretentious I’m getting while they sipped their afternoon tea, or cleaned the grape jelly off their walls. Whatever. Sure Brave was good but Brave is the straight “A” student who sits in the front row and brings the teachers fresh apples wrapped in five dollar bills every day. Everybody likes Brave. You have to. Ice Age 4 is the kid with ADD who spends the class period seeing how many Skittles he can get in his nose at once who somehow manages to get an “A” on his spelling test using his crayon and some old gum he stole from Tommy Bupkis.

8. Prometheus

I never got around to reviewing this movie because… I don’t know. Aliens. Or something. Either aliens or apathy. One of those “a” words. Maybe Applebees? Anyways, I liked Prometheus. It brought out some really cool “maker and creator” questions and featured some absolutely top shelf acting work by Michael Fassbender. That said it also had a woman running away from a crashing spaceship about two minutes after an emergency Alien C-section so ya know…. it had issues.

7. The Grey

Man… this movie barely seems like it came out in 2012 but boy did it ever. Oh Liam Neeson… how I love you. Seriously though, I loved the Grey. Sure it had more F words then McDonald ball pits have communicable diseases but I still loved the Grey. The story was heartbreaking and beautiful and almost broke my soul into a million tiny pieces. Fortunately for me I traded my soul for half a kit-kat bar months ago.

6. Les Miserables

Hugh Jackmen and sideburns are the Peanut butter and jelly of our generation.

Hugh Jackmen and sideburns are the Peanut butter and jelly of our generation.

Yeah kinda lower than I thought it would be too. I just watched this movie this week and it wasn’t that I didn’t like it. (it is, after all, in the top ten) it was more that I just didn’t ever buy into the second half of the film. Anyway though, I’ll talk more about this when I review the whole movie later on, but suffice to say that I really liked Les Mis, I just didn’t want to adopt it and bring it home. Which is ironic… I think.

5. Pitch Perfect:

Man, how have I not reviewed any of these movies? I really liked Pitch Perfect. It was sort of the anti-Les Mis. It was funny and charming and took me off guard and didn’t really care what I thought about it. Whereas Les Mis was constantly checking to make sure I was depressed enough. I don’t know… I consider myself a fairly deep person I just—eh-hem… sorry. I’ll talk more about Les Mis later I promise. This is Pitch Perfect’s moment in the spotlight and so I shall let it stand there in a doo-woppy sort of pose wearing it’s sun glasses and not caring. Thank you Pitch Perfect.

Yeah I know... I was surprised too.

Yeah I know cast of Pitch Perfect… I was surprised too.

4. The Hobbit

Hey, it’s another movie I haven’t reviewed yet!! This list is starting to pile up. I really enjoyed the Hobbit, and yes I will review it later and yes I will tell you all of my thoughts on it. But for now let me just say I thought it was fun. Sure it was different from the originals, and sure it dragged at points, and sure Peter Jackson decided to turn Radagast the Brown into a rabbit enslaving crazy person but ya know what? It was fun.


Okay so I was really torn about these next three movies. They all had things I really liked about them and all surprised me in different ways. But as opposed to having a 1a, 1b, and 1c; I decided to stick them in a mostly arbitrary order and go on from there. You could honestly talk me into any of these three being number one depending on how recently I had eaten and what color boxers I happened to be wearing on that day. Anyway… here we go.


3. Skyfall

I think movies need to start donating the awesome cars they use to poor people. And by poor people I mean, ya know, me.

I think movies need to start donating the awesome cars they use to poor people. And by poor people I mean, ya know, me.

Oh Daniel Craig… here we are again. And I still loved Skyfall. Really probably the best action movie of the year if you’re not counting super-heroes (and no James Bond is not one), Skyfall just blended the different aspects of the movie so well that I could not help but enjoy it. The story was great, the characters were moving, and the action was solid. Skyfall was a perfectly blended smoothie of awesomeness and I applaud it in a British sort of way.

2. The Dark Knight Rises

Oh Batman. How I will miss you. And yes I did say MISS you, DC comics. At least go five or so years before re-booting this okay? I know you have cash and a cow or… something, but please just let me enjoy the awesomeness for five years okay? I know people hate on this movie a lot and sure I’ll openly admit to you that I still liked The Dark Knight better but considering that the Dark Knight might be my favorite movie ever and is definitely in the top 5 is that really saying anything bad? I loved the characters, thought Anne Hathaway was great as Catwoman, and totally bought into Bane as the villain. It was a great, great movie that ended the series well (if not exactly how I would have ended it) but then again I would have ended Brave with the bear winning so… I’m probably not the person you want to go to for that sort of thing.


If only…

1. Avengers


This is probably the single most over-used picture on the internet. (Justin Bieber excluded.)

Avengers!! I who did not believe in you, have come to love you most of all. So welcome, have a seat, grab some peanuts and watch as I sing your praises to the heavens! Or at least write you a very flatting paragraph. One of the two… … … okay apparently no one’s gonna sing. Sorry.

Avengers was final and definitive proof that ensemble super-hero movies can work! If, that is, you get a perfect cast, perfect director, brilliant script, and the right group of super-heroes, but nevermind the fact that every studio is now laughably scrambling to try and get their own ensemble movies together. Nevermind that all of those projects will probably be laughably bad, because you did it Avengers!! You accomplished what I genuinely thought was impossible. So thank you Avengers, and thank you audience! You’ve all been great!! See you next year!!… or this year… or something. Later!

I have no logical reason for posting this... except, ya know, awesomeness.

I have no logical reason for posting this… except, ya know, awesomeness.

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