Another day another random blog

Posted: October 8, 2012 by Micah in Randomnicity

Hey everyone, so I’m sorry for the unexplained absence on Thursday. I was dead.

Which is to say sick… really sick. And the first thing to go when I get sick is my brain so I figured writing a blog article at a time when my brain was vacationing in the Hamptons was probably a bad idea. But now, as a special incentive laden gift to myself: I am still sick. But I’m gonna post anyway, because I am a man who keeps his promises… ish. A man who never backs down in the face of moderate to slight peril. A man sitting at a keyboard, late late at night, who is mostly bored. And thus: I shall blog.

So we’re gonna take a break from Princeology while my brain heals so check back Thursday for the thrilling climax to that particular carnival ride. Instead I will here-in post a bunch of really random and mostly unconnected thoughts regarding whatever paper mache’ party theme happens to be going on in my brain.

I don’t know if you guys know this or not but Liam Neeson is sixty years old!! Sixty. Man, if I am half as awesome as Liam Neeson is when I’m sixty I will  definitely not be me anymore. I will have been abducted by aliens and replaced with a far more awesome body clone. Powered entirely by British Pastry’s.

Did you know you can go to Redbox and rent “Jersey Shore Shark Attack” right now? Let me give you a synopsis of the film from the Redbox description “What better place to be than on the Jersey shore over the Fourth of July weekend where hot babes and dudes are partying their brains out. When a swarm of sharks descends on the Jersey shore, these hotties must battle for survival.”  Doesn’t that just warm your heart? I mean who knew that a Junior Higher could come up with a movie idea, get funding, hire actors and produce a major DVD release in our world today? If I wasn’t already sick, I would be getting sick right now.

Also, the Lone Ranger just came out with a new trailer. I can’t really decide how I feel about this movie. Sure Johnny Depp runs around with a crow on his head that may or may not still be alive but really is that a surprise to anyone? If Johnny Depp walked into the room right now wearing a live flamingo as a sweater I wouldn’t even be super surprised.

Johnny what did we say about bringing the Crow hat inside? You know it poops on all the furniture…

As has been documented on this sight before I’m a big Red Sox fan. That said, I have never been happier for a baseball season to be over then I was this season. The Red Sox had their worst season in my lifetime (literally) and managed to not just be terrible, but to be terrible in an unsympathetic way. I mean it’s one thing to be the little fat kid who comes in last because he had an asthma attack halfway through the race. At least you can watch that little fat kid and feel bad for him, pat him on the head, and give him a donut. And then take that Donut away… fatty. The Red Sox are that spoiled athletic kid who came in last because he stopped to talk to a cute girl and scrounge around in the dirt for a nickel. Then when they get to the finish line complain that it wasn’t a fair race because no one else was as stupid as they were. Needless to say: I did not have a good baseball season.

So the James Bond franchise turned fifty last week. Holy cow. That’s a long time…. Normally I would put a joke here about Pierce Brosnan being a wuss who nobody liked or something but I’m sick and sleepy and one of my fingers is going numb so instead I’m going to put up this picture.

tee-hee

JK Rowling recently published her first non-Harry Potter typed book. It’s something about the struggles of  a small town when someone dies unexpectedly and becomes Lord Voldermort…. I may have made up that last part. I read some of it but only enough to make sure it wasn’t some sort of elaborate metaphor or that Alan Rickman wasn’t in it but as soon as those two choices were eliminated it was just another book about a lot of people that I don’t care about and who aren’t as sick as I am.

What do you mean I’m not in the book?

The Avengers might have Marvel-girl in it. Marvel-girl is listed right up there with She-hulk and Raisin Bran as things women will never be able to identify with or care about. Marvel-girl is indestructible or something cause she got exposed to the some nuclear fallout from Captain Marvel or something… Also nobody cares and she’s a terrible character. Thanks Marvel.

The Director of the new Godzilla movie (still in the works) recently said he really wanted the movie to be “grounded in reality”. I feel like that’s a little bit like saying you really want your ice cream sundae to be “grounded in health.” Doesn’t the fact that your movie contains a giant death monster automatically disqualify it from being “grounded in reality?” Just like by being about me my memoir’s will not be “grounded in ground” or “contain complete sentences.”

Man… look at that realism…

Anyway that’s all I got. Check back on Thursday when I get back to Prince-ology and also… ya know… being funny and coherent and things. See you then!

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