Posted: June 25, 2012 by Micah in Movie Reviews
Tags: , , , ,

Internet!! I’m back! Good gracious gravy it’s been like what? Years? Weeks? Lifetimes? Who knows really? If only there was some sort of time telling device thing conveniently located on my computer a mouse click away… but alas. There is not. Anyway though, regardless of our pasts, and the things that have driven us apart over the years… the things we squabbled over like: who would do the dishes and why you never paid me that million dollars I’m pretty sure we agreed you would give me. Here I am; standing strong and resolute and staring out into the vast untamable ocean of the future and wondering why the future is an ocean to begin with? Why not a meadow? Or a piglet? Or something.

But regardless of futuristic tiny pigs it’s time to stop tapping keys randomly as I long for the cool taste of an iced coffee and start doing that pop culture thing I do. Starting with…

Micah Reviews: Brave

Brave: The best thing to happen to red heads since Anne of Green Gables and Amy Pond.

The Plot:

Somewhere amongst the hills and plains of medieval Scotland we’re introduced to tiny 3ish year old Merida. A delightful Scottish girl raised amongst the hills and plains of medi… sorry. I like the hills and plans of Medieval Scotland okay? Shut-up. Anyway, Merida is the daughter of the King and Queen (yes that makes her a Disney princess. No I don’t care) and within mere minutes of the movie’s opening we’re introduced to what is bound to be the main villain of this movie: a giant killer bear of death.

If there’s one thing Brave does right; it’s adorableness.

Fast forward ten years… I think… maybe not that many. Fast forward some years and we’re introduced to a now teenage Merida and her three criminally adorable little brothers Flopsy, Mopsy, and Abednego. All is not well it would seem though in the house of whoevers house this is as Merida’s mother, Queen something or other, insists that Merida grow into the perfect lady rather than the red haired rag and muffins girl that Merida wants to be.

All of this comes to a head when the three neighboring tribes all show up and, in typical neighboring tribe fashion, burn everything to the ground. Wait no… I mean have a contest to see who gets to marry Merida.

Merida is (understandably I feel) against the whole idea and must choose whether to rise up against her fat or settle for  a lazy boy bound future filled with M&M’s and empty promises…. wait… I feel something went wrong somewhere in there… oh I mean fate. Rise up against her fate! That makes more sense and sounds far less horrible.

Merida must not only decide whether to rise up against her fate or settle for a life of sad marriagededness but also must learn to deal with the consequences of her actions. Oh and the big evil death bear comes back. If you were wondering.

The Positives:

There’s something to be said for a studio that has now popped out 13 consecutive movies that opened at number one. And that something is “May I have some money?” Brave is just another example of Pixar/Disney making a great movie that kids and adults can both enjoy. A movie parents can take their children to watch, and a movie that annoying high schoolers who sit two rows in front of me and laugh obnoxiously loud can go to without fear of me haunting their souls to the very pits of Shell gas stations… maybe.

I could really go on for a while here but frankly you can probably guess what I’m about to say if you’ve seen any other Pixar movie. The voice acting was solid and perfectly cast. The humor was great, the story was heartfelt, and the visual aesthetics were perfectly captured. The visuals won’t “ooh and ah” you exactly but at the same time there so beautifully and realistically portrayed that you can’t help but be taken away by it all.

Finally a special mention has to go to whoever was in charge of how awesomely Scottish this movie feels. From the majestic grassy fields, to the spot on accent work (very Scottish without being unintelligible (editor’s note: Here’s to Micah apparently running headlong into a dictionary tonight. “Unintelligible” now if only he could spell words like “cat”), to the beautiful soundtrack the whole movie just oozes down to earth Scottish awesomeliness.

I’m legally obligated to incorporate a picture of these adorable triplets into this blog. The amount of “Aws” in this movie have been equaled only by the sighs of adoration from teenage girls looking at shocks of Justin Bieber’s golden hair.

The Negatrons:

Ummm… not really much to speak of here. The movie feels a little generic but after 13 straight movies of greatness I guess you can accept some generic goodness. Like a heart healthy bowl of coffee ice cream Brave is another great movie even if it doesn’t really strive to do anything we haven’t seen Pixar do before.

In Conclusion:

Brave is a great movie. Well cast, well visualized, with a great story, and a good mix of humor and heart. It won’t change the way you watch movies or make you any less afraid of giant death bears released from the very pits of Martha Stuart Living but then again it’s not really trying to. It’s just telling a great story the whole family can enjoy.

I give it 4 disgustingly cute Scottish childrens out of 5.


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