Well here we are as another Thursday rolls around and I sit here and try and come up with words to say and see how many times I can work angry Pilot Fish into a post.
Being the pop culture savvy sort of person that I am, I have a few websites that I hit up for movie/tv/gaming/grizzly bear news. Recently I found an article on the Top Ten Most Rented Netflix Movies of all time!! So I thought I’d slap that list on here and do some talking/writing on the basics of each movie and the apparent over all intelligence of the modern Netflix watcher. And so, shamelessly ripping off the title of the article I read, I’ll call this
The Top Ten Most Rented Netflix Movies of All Time (copyright Micah Thompson 2011…. Pilot Fish…)
10. No Country For Old Men
Ah the Coen brothers (directors of this movie and last years underratedly awesome True Grit), I’ve been meaning to do a full review of this movie for a while now so I don’t want to steal too much of my own thunder but it is a GREAT movie. Some phenomenal acting performances by Javier Bardem and Tommy Lee Jones round out an incredible movie with a great story and an awesome atmosphere. The downside of course is that the movie is INCREDIBLY violent. And that’s coming from me. A guy who routinely bathes in the blood of his enemies (most of my enemies are water based… or (in fact) made entirely of water).
9. Iron Man
Probably the best of the Marvel Super Hero movies to date, Iron Man stars the phenomenally talented Robert Downey Jr in his second best role (more on his best role later). Iron Man was such a good mix of great acting, brilliant writing, humor, storytelling, and a movie that had a character who you never stopped liking even though he was sort of a jerk. Also robotic metal suits of awesomeness.
I composed a 1500 plus word love letter to Inception over here. That pretty much says everything I have to say. Except for: Zero Gravity Hotel Fight.
7. Sherlock Holmes
THIS is Robert Downey Jr.’s best roll. Hands. Down. He nails the super sleuth so thoroughly it’s astounding! Jude Law plays Watson absolutely perfectly as well and the movie really does serve as a tour de force (A star wars term meaning: Tour of the Force) of acting awesomeness. Some great lessons learned about on screen chemistry, atmospheric storytelling, and punching people in the solar plexus.
6. The Departed
Umm… random movie to have here. This now makes two De Caprio Movies and two Robert Downey Jr movies so far. Here’s hoping someone breaks the tie eventually. Oh and The Departed was a good movie with a great cast and a lot of cussing.
5. The Hurt Locker
One of the more random entries on the list. I liked the Hurt Locker… I guess. I mean it was good. It just took a long LONG LONG LONG LONG time to be good. A LONG time. Jeremy Renner is clutch and got some very well deserved acclaim for the part but… it’s a long movie.
4. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Another sort of random entry… in fact the more I look at this list the less it makes sense. 10-7 felt about right but honestly the rest of these movies have this odd sort of “Oh I heard that was interesting let’s get it from Netflix and watch it” rather then “Hey that was a great movie let’s watch it again.”
Oh, the Curious Case of Benjamin Button was about someone who was born old and aged backwards and had Brad Pitt in it.
3. The Bucket List
An okay movie with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson (this makes two movies for Nicholson now as well. Man I hope this tie gets broken) who play an unlikely pair of old men who are gonna die and go around doing a bunch of weird things that they’ve always wanted to do but never did cause they didn’t think they were going to die…. what I didn’t make it up.
Okay this is just bizarre now. Crash is a movie that was written to see how many F bombs could be fit into one script without someone physically collapsing. I’m not saying it’s a bad movie, though it kind of is, I’m just saying there’s such a thing as realistic language, such a thing as unrealistically passive language, and then there’s such a thing as unrealistically aggressive language. This is category 3. Crash is just a weird film experience because it is (at its core) about a bunch of jerks. If a rabid spoon came through the middle of the movie and killed of all of the main characters I would probably applaud it, and maybe try and set it up on a date with a fork or something. No one in this film is worth cheering for. No one wins.
1. The Blind Side
Say what?? Really??? The Blind Side? This floored me. You could almost say I was blinsid… nope… nope I can’t say that. I will not stoop to that level. Seriously though, I have nothing particularly against this movie I just… THAT many people watched this? More people then rented Remember The Titans? Or The Italian Job, or the Oceans Movies?? I’m not saying The Blind Side is a bad movie cause it really isn’t but… man. Number 1?
This brings an interesting thing to mind. What’s the difference between a movie you buy and a movie you rent? I guess you buy movies for a couple reasons:
1. You’ve already seen the movie and liked it.
This happened to me and some friends in Wal-mart a couple weeks ago. We were there to pick up a few things we needed for the daily grind we were grindin when we saw that Thor was out on DVD. “Thor?” We said to our collected selves. “That movie was awesome. Chris Hemsworth is HUGE…. I wish I was Chris Hemsworth… and huge… and Thor.” Maybe it was just me that said that last part. The point is we knew we were going to enjoy Thor cause we already had. So we bought it.
2. It’s a movie that for some reason (cast, director, friend recommendation) you’re pretty sure you will like.
I did this when Hamlet (starring David Tennant and Patrick Stewart) came out on DVD… well to be entirely accurate I did this about two months before Hamlet (starring Dr. Who and Captain Picard) came out on DVD thanks to a wonderful thing called “Pre-ordering.” Based on the script and the lead actors there was a 99.9 percent chance that I was going to like this movie. So I bought it.
Renting movies though is a totally different thought process. Especially with a service like Netflix where you have to order a certain number of DVD’s to get your money’s worth.
“What? Brad Pitt plays in a movie where he is born as an old man? Well I’ll add it to the Netflix cue.”
“Wait Sandra Bullock has a southern accent?”
“Hang on, hang on, they say how many F Bombs? Stick it on the cue!”
And thus goes Netflix.
So there you have it. A column made up of a top ten list that may or may not actually accurately reflect the goodness of the movies. So… really kind of a pointless exercise now that I think about it…. man… I wish I’d have thought of that about 1,200 words ago… Oh well.